Tag Archives: Michael Ealy

Cinema Dispatch: The Intruder

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The Intruder and all the images you see in this review are owned by Sony Pictures Releasing and Screen Gems

Directed by Deon Taylor

It either takes a whole lot of brains or a whole lot of nerve to try and squeeze a non-franchise thriller right between such big box office money sinks, and when talking about Screen Gems it can go either way.  Yes, this is the studio that made my beloved Resident Evil movies, but also gave us the horrendous Slender Man, and frankly the rest of their filmography is just disparate; but all the credit to them for churning out low budget shlock and turning it into box office gold!  They’re like the Blumhouse of the mid 2000s that’s still hanging around on the margins making ridiculous stuff like When the Bough Breaks, but also some real modern classics like last year’s Searching which you all better have seen by now!  Where exactly will this movie fall in the Screen Gems canon?  Well you can probably take a guess given its silly premise and wacky stunt casting, but let’s find out!!

Scott and Annie (Michael Ealy and Meagan Good) are your typical city folk who spent their entire married life in the hustle and bustle and have decided that now might be the PERFECT time to find a place a little off the beaten path and settle down to start a family.  Hold your horses though!  They aren’t looking for just ANY house!  They want the PERFECT house that has like a bajillion rooms, a giant yard, and some real history to it!  Well lucky for them that they found the one dude with the perfect house AND a strong need to sell it as soon as possible!  Yes, good ol’ Charlie (Dennis Quaid) is moving to Florida to be with his daughter and has decided to sell his family home.  Four generations have lived in this house, and for a rather steep price Scott and Annie can be the fifth.  After some careful consideration and another look at the size of this place (they’ll have to Airbnb this mansion year round just to keep up with the payments!) they decide to purchase it and give Charlie a fat stack of cash that he can retire on!  Everyone’s happy, right?  Well… as it turns out there are a few loose ends here and there that Charlie needs to finish up and is still in town, but that’s not a problem, right?  Well… he noticed the yard is looking a bit overgrown and thought it’d be neighborly to mow the yard, but that’s a good thing, right?  Well… let’s just say that one thing leads to another, and another, and another, until Scott and Annie begin to wonder if this guy is ever gonna go to Florida, and that’s just the beginning of the weirdness that these two are being subjected to with Charlie still around!  Will Scott and Annie ever get rid of this dude who CLEARLY didn’t seem ready to sell his house?  What exactly does Charlie have planned, and just how far will he go to take back what he believes is rightfully his?  Anyone get the feeling that this is what he did after making Movie 43?  I mean sure he had money BEFORE that film, but that’s a movie so bad that it retroactively sucks away any success you may have had.

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“I’m collecting for the Quaid Quality of Life Fund.  Your contributions will go directly towards funding a sequel to The Rookie.”

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Cinema Dispatch: The Perfect Guy

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The Perfect Guy and all the images you see in this review are owned by Screen Gems

Directed by David M Rosenthal

When a movie comes out the same week as another possible Shyamalan disaster and another Christian film to add to the catalog of faith based cinema, it’s pretty easy to get lost in the shuffle.  Yet somehow, The Perfect Guy managed to not only bump the new releases out of the top spot but also overcame the smash hit of the season (Straight Outta Compton) and the flash in the pan garbage of the moment (War Room).  Is this movie a surprise gem in a very uneven post summer season, or will this turn out to be another inexplicable hit that everyone forgets about once it drops away in a week or two?  Let’s find out!!

The movie is about a highly successfully lobbyist named Leah (Sanaa Lathan) who’s got the perfect life with the perfect guy (though not the titular Perfect Guy) in the form of David (Morris Chestnut).  Despite outward appearance though, the couple are having difficulties behind the scenes because David just isn’t ready to get married and have kids while Leah getting more and more nervous about waiting until he’s ready which seems less and less likely to happen as the days go buy.  The couple end up splitting because of this and Leah is completely distraught and just throws herself in her work to try and forget the [breakup].  Will she ever find love again?  Well yes, because this one guy named Malcolm (Michael Ealy) swoops into her life and is just too good to be true!  I mean, anyone else wouldn’t have picked up on a whole lot of warning sign beforehand, but she’s just happy to have someone [be nice to her] and she goes along with it.  Bad call because once she does see the creeps true nature (he mercilessly beats the shit out of some guy for dubious reasons), she tries to end it and Malcom just isn’t hearing it.  Things continue to escalate as he begins stalking her and taking more and more drastic actions to get or attention which is throwing everything in her life into disarray.  Can the police and her own support network shield her from his attempts to sabotage her life?  Will she be forced to take matters into her own hands to stop this creep?  Isn’t this just a gender swapped version of that Idris Elba and Beyoncé movie!?

“Is it too late to be a villain on Dexter?”

“Is it too late to be a villain on Dexter?”

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