Category: Living on Netflix

Living on Netflix: Ridiculous 6

~ Matt Vetrano ~ 4 Comments

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After the cinematic horror show that was the ill-conceived Pixels, Adam Sandler was banished to the world of streaming and will not be allowed back into theaters until his penance of four movies is paid!  Okay, the four movie deal with Netflix was already underway before Pixels (or even Hotel Transylvania 2) was released, but considering how absolutely dreadful his career has been with the movies under the Happy Madison umbrella, it really does feel like he needs to be taken out of the spotlight for a while just to see if the change in scenery will bring some life back to him and his chosen profession.  Is The Ridiculous 6 the movie that will finally bring him back to top form, or is this yet another pointless exercise from a man who gave up on being funny a long time ago?  Let’s find out!!

The movie begins with, what else, RACISM!!  Seriously!?  I can’t even get thirty seconds into an Adam Sandler joint before I’m itching to turn the damn thing off!?

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That’s a bad sign… (rimshot)

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Living on Netflix: Horns

~ Matt Vetrano ~ Leave a comment

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You know, considering how big of a child star Danielle Radcliffe was, he’s doing pretty well for himself.  He tends not to take big budget fare and instead prefers to hang around in the indie scene while he polishes his chops.  Sure, he was in The Woman in Black, but it’s hardly one of those soulless studio hack horror films that OTHER cast members found themselves in (*cough*The Apparition*cough*).  With all that said, let’s look at this dark fairy tale from 2013 called Horns.  Is it another example of Daniel Radcliffe building his artist credibility, or is it a misstep in the young actor’s post Harry Potter career?  Let’s find out!!

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Living on Netflix: I, Frankenstein

~ Matt Vetrano ~ 3 Comments

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This 2014 film based on a graphic novel by Kevin Grevioux (who also wrote all the Underworld movies), somehow take the Frankenstein monster and has him fighting legions of demons.  Well you can’t say that’s not one of hell of premise!  I’m actually for wacky premises like this with characters you’d never expect.  Hell, it’s not like Universal was above putting it’s own monsters in crazy and outlandish situations to make a quick buck!  They’re the guys who practically invented the idea of cross over movies!  All that said, the lukewarm buzz around this film when it was released doesn’t give me a whole lot of hope, but you never know with something like this.  Is the movie a fun and cheesy romp, or is it just as bad as every says it is?  Let’s find out!!

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Living on Netflix: Mac and Devin Go to High School

~ Matt Vetrano ~ 1 Comment

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You may recall a jaunty little tune from 2011 called Young Wild and Free by Snoop Dogg and Wiz Khalifa.  If you saw the music video, you might think that it’s making fun of dopey movie soundtracks because scenes from what appears to be a REALLY terrible high school movie are being played during the video.  What a great gag, right?  Harkening back to the days when soundtracks would overshadow the terrible films they were written for!  Wait, they actually made that movie?  And it’s on Netflix?  And Timmy is trapped in a well?  I’m not sure how to solve that last thing, but I guess I now have to watch this crap.  Get ready everyone, because we’re about to take a look at Mac and Devin go to High School!

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Living on Netflix: Nativity 2: Danger in the Manger

~ Matt Vetrano ~ 2 Comments

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It is once again Christmas time, and we all know what that means!  CRAPPY HOLIDAY MOVIES!!!  Ugh… I was not looking forward to having to do a Christmas movie considering how chock full of crap the genre is filled with, and the knowledge that I COULD be watching much better holiday films instead of whatever one I decide to review.  Netflix must have heard my thoughts (I think that’s part of their license agreement) and delivered unto me a holiday film called Nativity 2: Danger in the Manger starring the one and only David Tennant!  Well it HAS to be good, right?  I mean, Dr. Who wouldn’t sign on to anything that sucked… would he?  There’s only one way to find out, and that’s to keep on reading!!

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Super Recaps: Sailor Moon Crystal (Episode 9)

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We once again find ourselves with a new episode of Sailor Moon Crystal!  I’ve been kind of down on the most recent episodes, but always still look forward to this show in the hopes that it’ll turn itself around.  Do the Scouts finally have a chance to breath and develop beyond their initial episode, or are we gonna keep barreling right along through the Moon Kingdom mythology instead of giving me a reason to care about any of it?  Let’s find out!

The episode begins where the last one left off, i.e. with Tuxedo Mask taking in a face full of dark magic at point blank range.

Good thing that such a horrible attack left his face completely unblemished.
Good thing that such a horrible attack left his face completely unblemished.

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Living on Netflix: Top 5 Movies to Stream for Halloween

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Most of this month, I’ve been pretty damn negative as I worked through the dregs of what Netflix has to offer in terms of horror.  Well… that’s actually not true.  Trust me, Netflix has MUCH worse stuff out there than lousy video game adaptations or embarrassing efforts made by once talented film makers.  Either way, I want to end this on a happy note and give you five awesome horror films to watch this Halloween.  These are listed alphabetically because I have no interest in ranking them.  They’re ALL worth watching!

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Living on Netflix: Madhouse

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That’s it! I’m SICK of all these crappy modern movies that try to call themselves horror! Even the great filmmakers like Argento can’t make anything worth a damn in today’s world. This time, I’m looking for something OLD! How old? Most of it’s cast better be fucking dead by now if I’m gonna sit through it! So let’s see… a movie starring Vincent Price AND Peter Cushing!? HELL YEAH!! Today we’re gonna take a look at film from 1974 called Madhouse. Is it a lost gem from the golden age of horror, or is it a well forget obscurity that both those great men wished everyone would ignore? There’s only one way to find out and that’s to keep on reading!!

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Living on Netflix: Dario Argento’s Dracula 3D

~ Matt Vetrano ~ 2 Comments

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You know what?  ENOUGH with these lousy horror films by no name directors!  I’m tired of this new-fangled independent crap, or these massively overproduced snore fests!  Give me a movie made by a director who KNOWS what the hell he’s doing!!  What’s that?  Dario Argento made a Dracula film a few years ago?  Well what the hell are we waiting for!?  With a director THAT good, it has to be amazing… right?  I mean, I guess it COULD be a piece of crap by an aging film maker who’s still trying to hack it long after his creative spark has dissipated, but that’s not even a REMOTE possibility… right?  Well there’s only one way for you to find out which one it is, and that’s to keep on reading!!

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Living on Netflix: Texas Chainsaw 3D

~ Matt Vetrano ~ 1 Comment

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A few years ago, the good people over at Lionsgate felt that at least one more film could be cobbled together from the remains of one of the original slasher killers, but didn’t think that making another remake this soon would be a very good idea.  Not one to NOT beat a dead horse, they decided to make a SEQUEL to the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre instead.  The strangest thing about this one though is that Tobe Hooper who directed the original and its sequel came out and supported this film during its initial release, claiming it to be a true follow up in both story and quality to his horror masterpiece.  Has Tobe Hooper sold his soul in order to pump up the sales of a subpar film, or does this really capture the spirit of what made the original so iconic?  Considering the title ends in 3D, I’m gonna guess the former, but the only way to find out for sure is to keep on reading!!

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