Sailor Moon Crystal and all the images you see in this recap are owned by Toei Animation and licensed by Viz Media
We’re back with another episode of Sailor Moon Crystal: The Please Forgive Us Season! Last week we got an episode that was about as good as we could expect from as show that has been as heavily retooled between seasons as this one was, but now it’s time to see if that was just a fluke or if we’re really gonna be getting a more than decent show now. Can the hot streak continue, or is this show about to go bust on the second round? Let’s find out!!
The episode begins as most evenings in the Tsukino household do; with Chibi-Usa needling her future mother and Usagi falling for it hook line and sinker. In this case, Chibi-Usa was on the phone with Mamoru. Take it away Usagi!
“I’m the one who’s gonna bring you into this world! I could very easily decide not to!”
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic and all the images you see in this recap are owned by Hasbro.
Episode directed by Denny Lu and Tim Stuby
We back with another episode of Cutie Mark Crusaders: The After Years! Considering they earned their marks towards the end of last season, we haven’t really had time to address what they would be doing now that they are no longer crusading. Will they’re post Cutie Mark debut be the start of new adventures and possibilities, or is this episode gonna be a huge admission of buyer’s remorse? Let’s find out!!
The episode begins with the Cutie Mark Crusaders decidedly not crusading for cutie marks to the Apple Bloom’ chagrin who would rather their time be spent not looking at each other’s asses.
“Did you see my Cutie Mark!?” “Yes, I’ve seen your Cutie Mark.” “No, but did you REALLY see it?” “I’m pretty sure I have.” “Well look again just to make sure!” “Yeah Apple Bloom! And then you can look at MINE again!”
The Boss and all the images you see in this review are owned by Universal Pictures
Directed by Ben Falcone
Melissa McCarthy has been around for quite some time, but her meteoric rise to super-stardom is nothing short of amazing, especially when you realize that Bridesmaids was only five years ago. She’s had her ups and downs to be sure with movies like Identity Thief and Tammy being total wrecks, and yet neither of those (nor anything else she does) can even put a dent in her ever growing box office power. Now on the brink of the biggest movie of her career, it’s time for her and her husband to take another crack at making a film all on their own to make up for the last one not turning out to well. Does this manage to prove once again that McCarthy is untouchable due to her skills as a leading lady, or will it prove that she’s untouchable due to career not slowing down in the slightest if this turns out to be a disaster? Let’s find out!!
The movie follows Michelle Darnell (Melissa McCarthy) who is the forty seventh richest woman in the world; a fortune she built from the ground up as she was adopted and abandoned no less than three times during her life. When the movie starts, she’s on top of the world but has lost touch with the commoners, which is especially apparent with the way she treats her assistant Claire (Kristen Bell). Not only that, she has an ex business partner (and ex-lover) named Renault (Peter Dinklage) who has been itching to get revenge on her and finally has an opportunity when he gets proof of committing a crime (insider trading) and reports her to the FCC. She goes to jail, loses all of her money, and comes crawling back to Claire. Will Michelle be able to earn back her fortune with the help of her former assistant and soon to be bestest friend? How far will Renault go to keep Michelle from finding success ever again? WHAT IS SHE HIDING UNDER THAT TURTLENECK!?
“Can you dig it? Can you dig it!? CAANN YOOUU DIG IT!?!?”
Hardcore Henry and all the images you see in this review are owned by STX Entertainment
Directed by Ilya Naishuller
Well it’s about time we got some badass action this year! Batman v Superman and Gods of Egypt turned out to be duds (admittedly I was a bit more optimistic of the former), and London Has Fallen turned out to be… well London Has Fallen. Can this unorthodox arthouse piece prove to the be shot in the arm we need in a landscape that only seems to care about action when super heroes do it, or will this experiment prove to be a resounding failure that glommed itself onto a half-baked gimmick? Let’s find out!!
The movie is all about Henry who is some dude that wakes up in a laboratory with amnesia, robotic limbs, and a hot wife named Estelle (Haley Bennett). For the most part I would call that a win-win, but of course nothing can go right for too long in a science lab, so the place gets attacked by… some guy. I’m pretty sure the dude’s name is Akan (Danila Kozolvsky) who has telekinetic powers… for some reason, and wants Henry… for some reason. No, I don’t know why he’s the ONLY ONE in this entire movie that has magic powers. In fact, there’s a lot about this movie I don’t know after seeing it, but I guess that’s not as important as the whole KILL EVERYTHING WITH YOUR BAD ASS ROBOT PARTS seems to take precedence over everything else. And that’s exactly what Henry proceeds to do for an hour and a half. His wife is kidnapped by the Akan the Black Mage, and he has to kill everyone in his path to get her back. Aiding him on his journey is the loveable Jimmy (Sharlto Copley) who’s pulling off an interesting trick here and has his own reasons for wanting to keep Henry alive and fighting. Will Henry get his wife back before it’s too late? Can this new cybernetic body handle all the stress and bullets that Henry is going to put it through? WHAT THE HELL DID HE JUST DO TO THAT GUY’S FACE!?
“You ready to see some shit? I don’t think you’re ready, but fortune favors the bold, right? No… Not really, but good luck to ya!”
Sailor Moon and all the images you see in this recap are owned by Toei Animation and licensed by Viz Media
Episode directed by Takao Yoshizawa
We’re back with another episode of Everybody Loves Nephrite! He certainly seems to have a way with people, though I’m guessing at least forty percent of his charm comes from being a monster spawned from the depths of hell. Everyone loves a bad boy! That is except Queen Beryl who’s getting just a tad tired of his failures and is itching to dish out some punishments! Will he be able to finally take out the Scouts before Beryl has him sleeping with the fishes? Let’s find out!!
The episode begins with Nephrite in his personal command center where he’s desperately searching for a way to defeat those pesky Scouts before Queen Beryl ends up Jadeite-ing his ass. The stars come to his aid once again (I imagine that he’s accruing quite a debt with them by now like Dr. Facilier in The Princess and the Frog) and show him that the one weakness is the same weakness that all heroes have; their heart! The key to defeating the Scouts (and Sailor Moon in particular) is to go after Tuxedo Mask! Sadly, he can’t jump on his new project just yet because he’s being requested to return to the head offices of Hell Corp for a performance review. Needless to say that Queen Beryl has had it up to here with the lack of dead Sailor Scouts, but doesn’t seem to have any ideas other than to blame the underlings. To be fair though, they can be QUITE sassy with her.
“YOU FOOL! How hard is it to kill a couple of teenagers!?” “Harder than waving your hands in front of a crystal ball.” “What was that?” “Nothing.” “WHAT WAS THAT!?” “…I’m sor-“ *ZAP*
Sailor Moon Crystal and all the images you see in this recap are owned by Toei Animation and licensed by Viz Media
After all this time, it’s hard to believe that we’ve finally getting more Sailor Moon Crystal to voraciously consume and then talk smack about! ADMIT IT!! All the fans out there who say the original is better; you eat this up too whether you like it or not! I was always pretty kind to Crystal and still have some affection for the first two seasons even if the flaws become oh so very apparent after going back to watch the original show. Still, the hype behind this season has only grown after Toei started revealing the tweaks to the art style and also at the prospect of having HD versions of the other Scouts like Neptune, Uranus, and Pluto; all of whom are pretty much a mystery to me outside of Neptune and Uranus being a couple who were turned into cousins when the show was initially brought to western audiences. Just like before, my first introduction to these characters and this story line will be through Crystal so despite my valiant efforts to catch up on the original series, I’m still woefully behind on that and will be watching these episodes of Crystal as a newcomer rather than a fan who can provide insightful comparisons. Will this show manage to recapture the glory of this season the same way the original did, or will I have to sit through the bastardization of what is considered the best story arc to many fans? Let’s find out!!
“For you to pre-order the deluxe edition! Reserve your copy now and get the characters you ACTUALLY want!!”
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic and all the images you see in this recap are owned by Hasbro.
Episode directed by Denny Lu and Tim Stuby
Season six started on a rather low key note with last week’s premiere not having much in regards to stakes or world building outside of the introduction of Flurry Heart. Still, while season five may have started SPECTACULARLY strong, it was right after the premiere that things started to go downhill with Castle Sweet Castle being a mindless slog to get through. Can this episode manage to keep the quality consistent with what we saw before, or is this season destined to have the same nose dive that season five found itself in when it refused to build off of what had been set up? Let’s find out!!
The episode begins with Rarity and Pinkie Pie on a train headed for Manehattan with the one looking to open a third boutique location (the best idea for any small business owner is apparently to overextend themselves) and the other on her way to visit Maud Pie; one of the more recent challengers for title of Best Pony.
“What about ME!? I’m the quirky one who breaks the fourth wall! I SHOULD BE THE FAVORITE!!” “Just because it worked for Deadpool-” “Oh THIS again!!”
God’s Not Dead 2 and all the images you see in this review are owned by Pure Flix Entertainment
Directed by Harold Cronk
The first God’s Not Dead movie came out about the same time as Captain America the Winter Solider. Went I went to see Captain America with some friends, the lines for the respective theaters lined up just right so that the Captain American line was right next to the God’s Not Dead line; two parallel lines essentially. I looked up and down the Captain America line, and saw kids, adults, families, millennials; all of different backgrounds and races. I look across from me and see the God’s Not Dead line which is filled with nothing but middle aged white people, and the young children of middle aged white people. The first movie was an unconscionably awful smear against everyone who didn’t subscribe to the filmmakers point of view, and I expect nothing less than that from the sequel. Is this just as bad, or can this possibly be worse? Let’s find out…
The movie is somewhat of a sequel to the original with only some of the secondary characters returning and there being a new protagonist (so basically the View Askewniverse for Evangelicals). The one to take over main character duties from Josh Wheaton is Grace Wesley (Melissa Joan Hart); a high school history teacher and devout Christian. What kind of Christian? Eh… it doesn’t matter I’m gonna guess she’s a Jehovah’s Witness. Anyway, one of her students Brooke (Hayley Orrantia) is trying to deal with the death of her brother, but isn’t getting much support from her ATHIEST parents who seem to be emotionally dead and barely registering that their son has died. I guess that’s what happens when you sell your soul to Satan or whatever they believe Atheist do. Brooke eventually approaches Grace outside of school for some advice and she learns that Grace gets through all the bad times do to her belief in Jesus. Cut to sometime later and it turns out that her brother was a closet Christian (okay…) which prompts her to read up on the Bible and she manages to get some comfort out of that. Fair enough, but here’s where things get tricky. Grace is teaching about non-violent protest leaders such as Gandhi and Martin Luther King, which prompts Brooke to ask if a parallel can be drawn between them and Jesus. Grace answers the question, all hell breaks loose as the school board finds out, and eventually she finds herself embroiled in a court case with her plucky lawyer Tom (Jesse Metcalfe) despite him being a “non-believer” (*cough* Bullshit *cough*). While this is going on, we also see how this case is affecting some of the characters who return from the last movie such as Pastor Dave (David AR White) who JUST SO HAPPENS to end up on the jury for the trial. It’s almost like it was fate or something! Can Grace and Tom win this case to preserve everyone’s right to their own faith? Will The Bad GuysTM manage to stop them and put all Christians to death in the process? DID THIS MOVIE JUST SEQUEL BAIT US!?
I think you and I are destined to do this forever…
Sailor Moon and all the images you see in this recap are owned by Toei Animation and licensed by Viz Media
Episode directed by Harume Kosaka
We’re back once again with another episode of Serenity’s Angels! With Nephrite’s plans failing over and over again (just like Jadeite’s) he’s in a precarious position as his chickens must eventually come home to roost. This episode seems to be heading in that direction, and we’re not that far off from Sailor Jupiter joining the cast, so maybe desperate Nephrite will be a bit more interesting than smug Nephrite. Even though his plots haven’t resonated as well for me as Jadeite’s have, it really doesn’t seem like it would take all that much to get the formula right. Can they pull it off this time, or is this doomed to be another example of them ALMOST but not quite getting it? Let’s find out!!
The episode begins in a place we haven’t seen for some time; the head office of Hell Corp. Nephrite is FINALLY being dragged back before the Mistress of Dark Kingdom to answer for his failings with Zoisite in attendance just to pour some salt in the wound. Not only is this scene great because we finally get to see Queen Beryl again, but also because we get to see Zoisite prove himself to be a mischievous little jerk as he intentionally tries to goad Nephrite into either working with him or sinking his own promising career; both of which seem to help him towards… whatever end goal he’s going for.
“Don’t you think it would be PERFECT if we were to work together? I mean, he’s CLEARLY been struggling to take out those Sailor Hussies!” “I’m inclined to agree with Zoisite.” “HELL NO! I’m not working with this jackass!” “…what did you just say to me?” “And MY work here is done! LATERS!”
The Reviewers Unite 