Cinema Dispatch: Self/less

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Self/less and all the images you see in this review are owned by Focus Features and Gramercy Pictures

Directed by Tarsem Singh

When did we get to the point that great actors like Sir Ben Kingsley and Ryan Reynolds are EXPECTED to be in crap like this?  Sure, Ben Kingsley at least has been on a downward slope for a while now, but does anyone else remember that Ryan Reynolds was HUGE just a few years ago?  I guess this is what happens when you somehow wind up in three of the worst comic book movies at a time when they’ve never been better.  Now he’s in yet another body switching film, only this one might just be worse than his last one if you can believe it.  Just how bad is this movie about Ben Kingsley turning into a thirty something white dude?  Let’s find out!!

The movie is about Damien Hale (Ben Kingsley) who’s a billionaire architect or something and is nearing the end of his life.  He has pretty cancer which is known to affect people in movies and it tends to present itself with absolutely zero external symptoms other than a bad cough.  Being the rich dude that he is, he finds a way to cheat death in the form of a brand new super-duper secret medical procedure called “shedding” where you basically swap brains with someone else through magnets.  Sounds like a good deal, right?  WRONG!!  Apparently this super-duper secret company doing these super-duper secret medical procedures has some skeletons in its closet and Gandhi in Green Lantern’s body is going to kick some ass until he gets the answers he needs!

“WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME ANY OF THIS!?!?”     “Why didn’t you check the FAQs page on the website!?  We put it up there for a reason!!”
“WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME ANY OF THIS!?!?”     “Why didn’t you check the FAQs page on the website!?  We put it up there for a reason!!”

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