A Bad Moms Christmas and all the images you see in this review are owned by STX Entertainment
Directed by Scott Moore and Jon Lucas
As glad as I was that the first film didn’t end up being an unbearable slog to sit through, I can’t say that the prospect of seeing another one fills me with much joy as I have serious doubts that STX can squeeze out another competent movie from this premise; especially when their go to idea for a sequel is to make it a freaking Christmas movie. Seriously, aside from Christmas Vacation and A Very Harold and Kumar Christmas, has there been a holiday themed sequel that WASN’T an absolute waste of time? Well I guess we’re about to put that theory to the test as we get ready to spend some more time with everyone’s favorite quote-unquote BAD MOMS who are actually not so bad moms. Does this manage to rise above the low expectations set for it being both a sequel and a Christmas film in one unfortunate package? Let’s find out!!
The movie begins with Amy (Mila Kunis) beginning her Christmas rituals of working way too hard and being utterly miserable in the process; not that anyone is REALLY asking her to do it as her two kids (Oona Laurence and Emjay Anthony) as well as her boyfriend Jesse (Jay Hernandez) and his daughter (Ariana Greenblatt) seem perfectly cool with a less intensive holiday experience. Now Amy would like nothing more than to just sit back and actually enjoy the season, but her plans to let go of the pointless and time consuming rituals that encompass the month of December are utterly destroyed once her mother Ruth comes to visit (Christine Baranski) who’s super judgmental, extremely demanding, and wants this to be the PERFECT Christmas for everyone! Sounds like a nightmare, right? Well it’s not much better with Kiki and Carla (Kristen Bell and Kathryn Hahn) who ALSO have their mothers coming into town (Cheryl Hines and Susan Sarandon) and all the baggage that comes with them; the former being overbearing and invasive and the latter being… well just like her daughter. Will the titular Bad MomsTM find a way to fight back against these unwelcome invaders and make this the best holiday ever? Is there more to the rather sudden appearance of their mothers than what they’re claiming to be a merely innocent interest in spending time with their family? Just how raunchy are they willing to get to stand out in the surprisingly crowded market of naughty Christmas movies!?
Santa and his ho ho hos! … WHAT!? You can’t just set me up like that and expect me NOT to go there!
Bad Moms and all the images you see in this review are owned by STX Entertainment
Directed by Jon Lucas and Scott Moore
It’s the triumphant return of Mila Kunis who… actually didn’t really go anywhere, but then Jupiter Ascending does feel like it came out a LONG time ago. Anyway, the trailers for this movie really didn’t inspire much hope as it looked like an unholy mashup between Mother’s Day and Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates, but the cast is pretty strong which is both good for this movie and also depressing considering really great actresses like the aforementioned Mila Kunis as well as Katheryn Hahn, Kristen Bell, Christina Applegate, and Jada Pinkett Smith are stuck doing stuff like this which in all honestly looks pretty bad. Does this movie manage to rise above expectations and turn out to be a delightful romp, or is this another failed comedy that’s trying way too hard and completely failing at being edgy? Let’s find out!!
The movie is all about Amy (Mila Kunis) who’s a mother of two and is struggling with the worst white people problems you can imagine! Her kids need rides to their extracurricular activities, she’s not appreciated at her high paying job, and her husband is a lazy slob who masturbates a lot. Okay, the PTA is an overbearing monstrosity headed up by the EVIL Gwendolyn (Christina Applegate) and her cronies (Jada Pinkett Smith and Annie Mumolo) so that sucks, not to mention that her husband is masturbating with another woman which is REALLY fucked up when they’ve been hiding it from Amy for ten months, so she’s on the edge of nervous breakdown. What could possibly put her over the edge? THE BAKE SALE! SCREW THAT SHIT! She’s done with ALL of this and is about to do HORRIBLE things like… have her twelve year old kids make their own breakfast and not go to the insane PTA meetings. Huh. Well, she finds some compatriots in her quest to become a “Bad Mom” (quotes very intentional here) in the form of Carla (Kathryn Hahn) who really IS a bad mom and Kiki (Kristen Bell) who’s in a really unhealthy relationship and is on the verge of her own emotional collapse. So they basically transition from being overbearing mothers to ones who demand space from their familes and for them to take on more responsibilities in their own lives. Doesn’t sound like much of a problem, but this doesn’t go unnoticed by Gwendolyn who maintains her iron grip on the PTA through intimidation and fear, so this “Bad Mom” as it were is a threat to her little totalitarian state and she will put a stop to it by taking it out on Amy’s kids. Oh HELL no! Amy’s not about to take that shit lying down, so on top of spreading the gospel of “Bad Moms”, she’s also going to run for PTA president to unseat the HBIC and be the HBIC herself! Can Amy succeed in getting the other parents on her side to stop Gwendolyn’s reign of terror? What consequences will this new form of parenting have on her home life and her children? Just how “BAD” are these mom’s gonna get!?
MOTHERS!? Imbibing of SPIRITS!? HOW ABSURD! I can feel my sense of moral fortitude being shat upon as we speak!
The Visit and all the images you see in this review are owned byUniversal Pictures
Directed by M Night Shyamalan
Oh good god, we have another M Night Shyamalan movie! After the travesty of… well everything after Signs, you’d think that he’d no longer be a big name director in Hollywood. Still, people kept giving him projects and he kept making terrible movies, culminating with the utter disaster that was After Earth. It seems though that he’s finally had to step down somewhat and has now released a low budget film with barely any recognizable actors and found footage gimmick. Will getting back to basics be exactly what this filmmaker needs to get his directing chops back, or is it too late for the man who could have been one the great auteurs of our time? Let’s find out!!
The movie is about Becca and Tyler (played by Olivia DeJonge and Ed Oxenbould), who are on a trip to see their grandparents. Their mother (Kathryn Hahn) had left things on pretty bad terms when she ran away to be with the man who would end up being the kids’ father, and she hasn’t spoken to them since then. Only recently did they get back in contact with their daughter and would like to have their grandchildren come visit them some time. An opportunity presents itself where the mother would need someone to look after the kids for a week, so she decides to let the kids go see them. The reason for the found footage approach with this film is that Becca is a filmmaker in her own right and wants to make a documentary of their trip to their grandparents house to not only go for an Oscar, but to show the footage to her mother to help her get over whatever it was that kept her away from her parents for so long. Of course, once they get to the grandparents’ house, things slowly start to get out of hand as both of them seem to exhibit strange and occasionally dangerous behaviors. Are these two the victims of some sort of degenerative neurological disease, or is there something more sinister at play?
“Oh don’t mind Granny. She just get possessed by Pazuzu everyone once in a while.”